Kids Know About the Election

Okay... the whole presidential election is just getting to be too much. I can't wait for November 5th to get here. It really is the biggest thing going on right now. Any other news is going to be overshadowed by the election.
Even little kindergarten students are getting worked up over it.
If you want to know what people are really thinking and saying about the candidates... just ask a kindergartner. You know they will be honest.
Myles is in kindergarten of course and they (kids in his class) discussed it. Their teacher threw it out there just to see what they may know. Well they knew a lot- may not have been all true but they know what is going on. Some things are enough to make the opposing side want to take off their earrings!
One student, when asked who Obama and McCain were, responded by simply stating the obvious, "Obama is Black and McCain is White."
They were then asked who they would vote for and why. I really didn't think they would have a lot of dialogue about this but....
One little boy stood up and said, "McCain wants to put taxes high (raising his hands high) and Obama wants to bring them low (lowering his hands)."
"Well we ain't votin' for Barack Obama because he don't believe in God," another little boy chimed in.
Then Myles stood up and said, "He does believe in God because my mommy wouldn't have voted for him if he didn't!"
Then he addressed the first student and said, "And he ain't Black- he is a Brown, African-American!"
You couldn't hear a crayon move for the next few seconds.

What's In A Name?

Okay. Can someone please help me explain to my husband that it is okay to call body parts what they are? And some of the names he would rather call body parts. I guess I have to remember that we are just gonna have some disagreements, but at the same time the kids are gonna get confused... so we thought.
Daddy still shifts awkwardly (picture the man in the movie Men In Black- the one who comes in the house with his body all "jacked up" and demands that his wife give him sugar in a cup- before she faints) when I use the word "vagina" around Maurissa.
He will run in (like the man in MIB) and shout, "It's a pocketbook!"
Well one weekend she stayed with a friend from church and after Maurissa took her bath, my friend asked her if she washed good.
"Yes, and I washed my pocketbook too!" Maurissa responded jubilantly.
My friend ran into the bathroom thinking she (Maurissa) had ruined her purse she had earlier.
"Oh... my daddy calls it a pocketbook, but my mom says it is a vagina," Maurissa told her. "My daddy (rolling her eyes) just has a hard time with that."

Curious Little Minds Wanna Know!

One of my co-workers, who is a single mom, loves to talk to Myles (he is still five). She asked him about one of the members of our church who is a mutual friend.
"Myles do you know Mr. Calvin at your church?" she asked.
"Yes. Is he your husband or sumpting (turning his head to the side)?"
"No. I don't have a husband- he is my friend," she replied.
"Wait. You don't have a husband?" he asked. "How you got a son and don't got a husband?"
(I tried to give her the look- the look that says "Just leave it alone!"Because he will press... curious little minds wanna know.)
"His daddy passed away a few years ago," she offered.
"Where he go?" he asked.
"Did he die from a disease?" his seven-year-old sister slipped in.
"He passed on- he is deceased," she told him.
"Where is he now?" Myles continued to press.
"At the graveyard," she answered.
I wasn't ready for that response.
"Did he got to hell or heaven?"
"Uh, let's go Myles and Maurissa- we gotta go!" I finally interjected.
As we walked on, he had to add something, "I'll pray for you a husband then."

Lost in Translation When You Are Already Fearful

Our son was sick yesterday and had a high fever. I could not get it down so we took him to the emergency room (it was after hours). Every five minutes he asked if he was going to have to get a shot.
"Myles let her put your arm band on," I said (referring to the lady who registered him).
"Is she gonna give me a shot?" he asked before offering his arm.
At this point I had to say something to relax him-
"Oh of course not. You are done with all of your shots buddy!"
When we finally get to the back to the nurse triage, he was still hesitant about things.
"Come on up here so I can get your weight," the nurse said.
He looked back at me.
"She would get in trouble to if she had a needle," I reassured him.
He finally relaxed too much once she sat down to enter information in her computer.
"Uh, you gotta back up, Myles, she doesn't need any help finding the keys."
I'm surprised she didn't say anything- he was right on her.
She went through the spill about allergies, any medicines and any concerns.
"Well, no one has ever said anything but there were a few times when he has come to the hospital and he was given albuterol and breathing treatments. I know that is for asthma right?" I asked.
"Well, his doctor would have to be the one to diagnose him," she replied.
Myles jumps on my lap and covers his face-
"The doctor is gonna dye my nose, mommy?"
Diagnose... dye his nose- I guess I can see why he thought that.