I guess I can understand why our kids may think we are dysfunctional parents. We used to try to talk in front of them by spelling words. "Did you get the t-i-c-k-e-t for our excursion to D-i-s-n-e-y?" I would ask Daddy. He would take too long to figure it out. I would get frustrated. Then our daughter, who was probably five or six at the time said, "Daddy. Did you get the tickets for our trip, to Disney World?" Then added, "Mama. You have to add an S to ticket because we need more than one."
And then there's the time (you can read it in an earlier blog) I wanted to just "keep it real" and tell our daughter that she had a vagina but her dad wanted to, and still does, refer to it as a pocketbook. I mean come on!
Well, we were eating out recently and our son asked how could people have children who aren't really theirs. I swallowed my drink, sat it down on the table and while looking at Daddy to get backup, I answered, "Well some people might have children before they get married. Then when they do they bring their children with them after they get married and start living together."
Daddy shook his head and muttered, "You shouldn't have opened that box." Our son sat there with a curious look. My answer had not satisfied his little curiosity. Before I could add on, his sister slurped her drink and said, It's like our uncle. He has a son who lives with him and he is his step-son. They are called step-children or step-parents." Then she went back to eating. Daddy and I just looked at each other.
But we weren't off the hook.
"But Uncle Don has another son who don't live with him. How did he do that?"
Daddy looked at me. "See Uncle Don used to be married to his son's mom a long time ago (lied). Then he got married to someone else." Our little one was now more confused than ever. Our little, well-educated daughter threw her hands up and said, with much volume, "They got a divorce! D-i-v-o-r-c-e!"
"Mama," our son started again. Before he could say anything else, I said, "Hey! Ask your sister."
They know more than we think.
Adventures of a seemingly dYsFUNctioNALl mom and wife!
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1 comment:
Ha - This was really funny!!! You kept me engaged through the ENTIRE journey! G-R-E-A-T writing!!
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