Fitting Room Blues

I made the mistake of taking our two little ones in with me to try on some clothes. The youngest one is very silly. Before I took my shirt over my head, the smart part of my brain told me not to do it, but I didn't listen. I thought they were distracted enough by their own little age-appropriate conversation, not to worry about me.
The snickering started quickly.
"Wook Rissa, look at mommy's big ole belly," Myles laughed.
I put my quiet sign up (finger over the lips), but they just couldn't seem to contain their little selves.
I was hot because there were plenty of other people in the fitting rooms.
I turned my back to them and tried to hurry and try on my clothes.
Made it worse.
"Ewww! Wook at mommy's big ole butt," he said loudly to his sister.
"Rest yo' mouth!" I told him.
I had to keep my eyes sternly on them while I got my clothes back on them.
Myles put his hands over his mouth to keep himself from laughing, while his sister pretended to say something.
I was so embarrassed.
"Okay fine! That art kit I told yall I would THINK about gettin'- well I ain't gettin' it now!"
I was one up on 'em now.
As I tied my shoes and prepared to go out, my little five-year-old had the nerve to say,
"If you don't buy us that thang, then I'm gone put a wast in yo' pocketbook."
I heard someone in a fitting room say, "Uh-oh."
I thumped him in his head. (no one could hear that)
"And it's wasP, anyway," I told him.
I peeked to see if anyone else was coming out of their rooms before I finally left out of the fitting room.
While we waited in line to pay for the shirt I got, Maurissa sees one of her friends from school.
"Is that your little brother?" her friend asked.
"Oh yes, he goes to the school now. And this is my daddy's wife," she said.