" My Own Shoes"

I remember getting "whoopings" as we say in the South, and then being so angry afterwards. I was ready to unleash on someone. But I wasn't crazy enough to think for a moment about it being my mom. And she could give 'em [whoopings] too. I really believed what she always said, "I brought ya in this world and I'll take ya out!" She would get me wherever the crime was committed: store, church, playground, skating rink, mall- it didn't matter. My mom would just raise her eyebrows at me and I stood at attention. No, I wouldn't dare think of taking my anger out on any adult, but one of my dolls would get her plastic body tore up. I would whip and talk on beat,"Didn't- I- tell- you-". Oh I vowed then that later when I had children of my own, I was going to whip their little butts as well.
Well as I have mentioned, we have two. When we usually go out shopping it is.... an adventure, for lack of a more suitable word. I put both of them in a cart. Yes people usually look at us and I realize it is probably because they are too big for the carts. Their knees are close to their chests and they can hardly move but it's only temporary. Before my brothers and I went into stores with my mom she gave us the five second warning, "You bet not touch nothing!" And we didn't need a cart for confinement. Well, upon entering Target, I give my warning, "Okay, if you are good, then daddy will take you to McDonald's". Ten minutes in and they are at each other as usual. I get them calm for all of five minutes, so I decide to speed through the store to get my items and think about how I am gonna get 'em when we get home. I finally get to the register. They see candy and beg for it. By this time they have managed to get on their knees and can reach for things. I take the candy and put it back and firmly tell them no. Our youngest begins to whine, while our oldest has her eyes closed, is smiling and humming. There is an older woman behind us, looking over her glasses at me with a look that says, "If you don't get yo' children". I flashback to my mom and try to step into her shoes. I tell them to get it together, then give them the "eyebrow raise", but my mom's shoes don't fit- my daughter raises her eyebrows back and says, without a fear in the world, "Mama why you looking at me like this?"